


Is That Enough?

by Trammel



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Addiction, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, M/M, Tony Feels, Tony Stark is a selfish bastard but he does have a heart
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-13
Updated: 2015-04-13
Packaged: 2018-03-22 16:56:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3736570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Trammel/pseuds/Trammel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony can control his drinking... until he can't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Is That Enough?

 

It had been a fantastic fight. At least it seemed that way from the parts Tony could remember. He had thrown things, broken things, and probably only avoided getting into the suit and doing more damage because, after his disastrous birthday party years ago, he'd set up a protocol for Jarvis to stop him from using the suit when he was drunk.

And boy, was he drunk. If the fact that he was hanging over the toilet puking his guts out was anything to go by.

Alone and puking, of course. Alone because he'd fought with Bruce, yelled at Bruce. And at first Bruce had just stood there and taken it. He didn't yell back, didn't turn into the Other Guy, because Bruce didn't see Tony as a threat. Refused to see Tony as a threat.

But Tony was a threat - to Bruce, to the team, to the whole fucking world at this rate. But maybe Bruce did realize that, because he eventually turned and left, before giving Tony a look, a horrible finality in his eyes. He'd left. Left Tony alone.

And Tony had crawled - yes, he was so fucking drunk he'd actually had to crawl - to the bathroom to hurl.

His hate for himself was like a living thing, dark and viscous and flowing through his veins. He'd ruined everything. Every single good thing that he had, and he probably deserved to be here alone, drowning in his own puke.

"Tony?" Bruce's voice.

Tony looked up from where he was sitting on the floor, propped against the toilet. Bruce was there. Standing in the doorway.

"I - I just - it's dangerous if you pass out. You could choke."

Yeah. Choke on his own vomit. The heroic Iron Man going out like Elvis. Bruce hadn't come back to fix things. There was no fixing things. He'd just come back to check that Tony was alive.

 _Is that enough?_ a voice in his head asked him.

Bruce's voice was flat, and Tony saw his eyes, was able to focus his gaze for a moment, to look at Bruce's eyes. They were empty. No love, no hate, no anger. Just empty.

 _Do you want to go on like this?_ the voice asked him.

 _I don't know,_ Tony answered in his own head. He didn't think he could go on like this.

He should let Bruce go. Bruce was certainly better off without him. But Tony wasn't anything if he wasn't selfish, and he realized the thought of losing Bruce was way more terrifying than the thought of never drinking again.

_Is that enough?_

"I-" Tony started. He was amazed he could actually form words, that his vocal cords were working.

Bruce put his hand out to stop him. "Please, Tony. Don't say you're sorry. Don't say anything. I just can't."

"I - I need help." The words were actually out of Tony's mouth before his brain could think them.

Bruce's eyes widened at that, and Tony saw - in them - the smallest, faintest spark of hope. Bruce always wanted to believe in people, even though he had put up with so many of Tony's lies and broken promises. Could he still believe in Tony?

"I need help." Tony said it again, and was hit by the amazing feeling that he meant it. He believed it.

_Is this enough?_

Having practically destroyed his penthouse and driven away the person he loved most in the world, sitting there in his own vomit, he could finally, finally believe it. At least a little bit.

"I can't control this." He gestured to himself in all his disgustingness. "The drinking. I can't control it."

Bruce's eyes were full now - of wariness, hope, disbelief, so many things that Tony couldn't handle it all. He looked down at the floor.

"Please," Tony whispered. "Please help me."

It seemed like he sat there staring at the floor for hours - years, even - before he heard Bruce move toward him.

Then Bruce was kneeling before him and crushing Tony in his arms. There was a strange sound. Crying. Bruce was crying, his face pressed against Tony's neck, his arms holding Tony so tight.

"I need help," Tony said again, to see if it felt the same. Bruce squeezed him tighter.

_Yes. Yes, it's enough._

Tony wrapped his arms around Bruce and squeezed back.

**Author's Note:**

> This just kind of came to me yesterday. Had to get it out. I don't think Tony is purposefully manipulating Bruce here, but see what you think.


End file.
